My Memorial to Dad It's difficult if not impossible to select from a lifetime a few highlights or anecdotes and capture the essence of a person or do justice to their time in this world. But what I can do is identify some of the things I take from the example of my dad's life. First, his confidence and self-assurance. Dad came from humble beginnings, born to parents of modest means. The high school he attended in rural Georgia did not even have a twelfth grade. But while this would have inhibited a number of people, Dad did not let this undermine his belief in himself. In his youth, Dad was fortunate to meet someone who saw potential in him and who encouraged him to consider a career in the ministry. And so he did precisely that. He went to college at Mercer University in Macon, Georgia, and after his graduation, he subsequently worked toward a graduate degree as well. This belief in himself is something Dad carried with him throughout his life. He always felt that no matter one’s beginnings, there was nothing one could not achieve through work and perseverance. And yet Dad never allowed his self-confidence to blind him to the gifts, skills, and contributions of others. Dad was always generous in his praise and compliments of people. By recognizing their unique talents, he was effective at bringing people together to co-operate on common aims. The second thing I take from the example of Dad's life is his dedication to service. Dad could have chosen simply to work for a living and support his family. And there is honor in that. But Dad wanted something more. He wanted to help people. He wanted to make a difference in his community. He wanted the world to be the better for his having been a part of it. And he did this through his ministry, to be sure, but not only through that. He did it also by acting as a consulting resource to other ministers. He did this by co-leading marriage enrichment retreats with his wife, Shirley. And in his retirement years, he did this through a number of other projects — not least was by acting as President of the Inter-Religious Council of Linn County (Iowa) and by founding and producing a television program, "Ethical Perspectives on the News,” which remains on the air today. The third thing I take from the example of Dad's life are the values and principles which guided him. My first experience with this was at the age of nine. At that time we lived in a small town in Kentucky, and as I began school in the fourth grade, it happened that my teacher (who I knew as "Miss Smith”) was black. And many parents, upon learning this, sought to have their children removed from her class and to be placed instead in the class of a white teacher — all for no reason but race. But my dad — and my mom as well — had no such concern. They shared with me the value that the color of a person's skin did not reflect in the least on their abilities or moral character. During this time, in his early to mid thirties, my dad practiced this value also through his propensity for ecumenical and interfaith co-operation. He did not confine his work to include only other white men but instead he made a point to establish ties with people of color as well. Specifically, he extended friendship and respect to a black pastor in town and was sure to include him as part of the community of clergy. Dad and Mom also invited this man's family to their home on several occasions. Moreover, as the social unrest of the period began to intensify, especially from the late 1950s and throughout the sixties, Dad came to observe that the Southern Baptist Convention of which he was then a part was taking an increasingly fundamentalist turn and was on the wrong side of the racial divide in the country. This was a deal-breaker for Dad and consequently he left the denomination and joined the more moderate American Baptist Association instead. (In the last decades of his life, Dad was a member of the Unitarian-Universalists.) For a Christian minister to leave one denomination in favor of another was very rare, but this is how strongly Dad felt about the principle of racial justice. Dad's sense of justice and fair play was not limited only to the question of race. Dad was a strong supporter of women in the ministry. He helped women with such aspirations and he was a strong advocate throughout his life. And later in his career, he performed a wedding ceremony for two women. He did so because he felt strongly that the love between two persons should not be encumbered or intruded upon by the state or society as a whole. This was one of his most deeply held convictions. The fourth thing I take from the example of Dad's life is that he was always in motion. We all are born into a culture of one kind or another and we all carry elements of that culture throughout our lives. This is inescapable, and Dad was no exception. However, he made an effort to have an open mind, and thus he was not one to accept all the customs, traditions, and social norms he was spoon-fed as a child. While he was supremely confident in himself, he never was so sure of something that he felt it could not be revisited and re-evaluated. Consequently, Dad's views underwent an evolution over time. Dad’s evolution could be seen in his theology and in his changing views on gender, marriage, and other features of culture. But it was not only in matters of the intellect that Dad grew over time but also in respect to his personality and psychology. While he always had a good sense of humor, people who knew Dad in his youth would not be inclined to describe him as the most jovial sort. Instead, in his early twenties he took himself ever so seriously. But over time, as Dad moved from his mid forties through his fifties and beyond, he learned to laugh at himself. He learned to lighten up and not to take himself so seriously. The fifth thing I take from the example of Dad's life is his warmth. He loved people and he was a very sociable person. Whether at home or on outings, Dad always enjoyed visiting with others and he was always game to meet someone new. He was never stingy with his smiles, and he always reached out to people so they would feel a part of things. Not even the ravages of Alzheimer’s could put a stop to Dad’s warmth. During my last visit, just this past September 2016, Dad would sit by the front window in his living room and gaze over at me as I sat just across from him on the sofa. I knew he no longer recognized me. I knew he no longer even understood that I was part of his family. But while that would have led many other Alzheimer’s victims to withdraw into themselves, not so with Dad. He just gave me a smile, waved, and said, “Hello friend.” Even to the very end, Dad wanted to make connections with people. And this is a legacy I can never repay and one I take with me for the rest of my life. Harold Mincey (1928-2016) A husband, father, and brother. A friend and neighbor. A community leader. A coalition builder. A minister. A counselor.

Jeff Mincey
October 29, 2016

Shirley and family - We were caring for our grandchildren that second week of October and missed this in the paper. I just found it when doing a search for another obituary this morning. Lee and I are both so sorry to hear of Harold's death, but we rejoice that he is with the Lord, singing His praises, and remembering everything clearly. We at blessed that so many of our clients are more friends than customers, and so it is with you and Harold. Everything that was said about his smile and warm greeting was so very true. Whether you came to the store or we bumped into you both at HyVee, Harold always greeted us with a smile and warm hello - even when he could not really remember who we were. His love of life, of people and especially of you, Shirley, was so obvious. It was our privilege to know him. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all. - Chris

Lee and Chris Fredrickson
November 9, 2016

Dear Mrs. Mincey, My family attended Chapel Park Baptist Church in Louisville, Kentucky, when your husband was the pastor. He baptized me when I was 7 years old, and I'm still living for the Lord. I look forward to seeing him in Heaven! Jan

Jan Poole MacKrell
February 3, 2017